Thursday, October 20, 2011

I wonder why?

Warning: I just re-read this post and even I can't make much sense of it but maybe you can :)

I call myself a "realist." Adam says sometimes I am a "pessimist." I disagree. I always try to look at the WHOLE picture. The good and the bad. I know that might not be the right or most healthy way, but it's ME!

I find myself saying, " I wonder why..." a lot. Especially lately. I am FULLY aware that we are never to question God and His plans for our lives. I get that. And I 100% have faith that His will for my life is perfect. But I am human. I am fleshly and I wonder things... I have anxiety over things...For me, it's VERY natural. It's something I have to fight. Hard!

I try hard not to over analyze things in my life (or others). But sometimes, I get caught up and am TOTALLY guilty of doing this. I do my VERY best not to judge others, because I don't want to be judged. I think people unfairly judge SO much. People don't know the "whole story" and they judge away. It's very easy to do via Twitter or blogs. I try to tell myself, "Lyndsey, you don't know the back story." I mean, who am I judge anyway? It's not my job to "figure it out." But I think it's a natural thing for most of us to "wonder why."

When you are invested in someones life, whether it be a blog friend, real life friend, or family, you often wonder "WHY?" Why did they do this? Why did they say that? Why would they go there? Why are they hanging with that person? WHY WHY WHY?

I am learning that I HATE that word WHY! By nature, I am a curious person. So that "why" word creeps up a lot in my mind. But sometimes it causes more bad than good.

I am really trying to leave the "whys" alone. I am trying to accept the "becauses" of life. Whether I agree with them or not. It's best for me. My life is changing daily. Some things are a struggle but I am trying to look at even the struggles as blessings. Am I always successful? NO. But I am trying.

I am working HARD to no longer wonder why about a lot of things in my life and just remember that I wasn't promised ALL the answers by my Heavenly Father. I wasn't guaranteed that life would be easy, that their wouldn't be pain, that friendships would last forever... but I do have a lot of guarantees and I am happy for those. I embrace those.

So today...I am committing to working HARD to let go of the "whys" of life...and embrace the BECAUSES.

WHY? Because I said so :)


Sole Matters said...

i love this post lynds!! thank you for the reminder!

Amanda said...

Love you friend!!! :)

Maria said...

You and me both, sistah! But it's easier said than done, for me at least. I need to stop questioning and doubting God, and just realize He knows best. He constantly reminds me that I have a wonderful husband and beautiful son and I just need to be patient. Thanks for these sweet words and great reminder.